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Born Cursed....

2011-11-23T08:51:00.000-08:00

When I need someone I find none. Its not that I don't have anybody just that I am born cursed.

Kanpur to Calicut

2008-05-21T01:17:00.000-07:00

It was summer 2008. Summer means holidays and holidays mean traveling families. On such a summer I was called to IIT Kanpur to attend an interview. The interview went off well and i was free to go by the noon. Only that I didn't know how to reach my home town of Calicut.

Kanpur is an industrial city on the banks of the Ganges in the middle of Uttar Pradesh. It boasts of an airport where all the planes fly to Delhi for 40 times the price of a train ticket. People traveling to Kerala are left at the mercy of the Gorakpur express. With holidaying at its peak its mercy was well into a long waiting list.

All direct routes were now closed. My attempt to find seat on a train from major cities and junctions around Kanpur failed miserably. The Indian Railways was out of the equation. I switched to plan B : Get to somewhere in south India and catch a bus home. The affordable alternative was to catch a plane from Delhi to Hydrabad and then travel further south by bus. Checked the net and found that there are more than a dozen planes flying to Hydrabad from Delhi and the ticket cost was about Rs.2800. I had no idea when I will reach Delhi airport so decided against booking a ticket.

Now I focused on the task at hand; getting to the Delhi airport. It was a friday evening and the temperature was about 43 degree. I was far outside my comfort zone facing the heat and was dehydrated and sleepless. All trains to Delhi was full and traveling by general compartment would take a hefty toll on me. The search led to UPSRTC website. I found a bus that would take me to Delhi.

Drank lot of water and got out of IITK embarking on an unknown journey. Stopped in front of an ATM to financially prepare for the flight on saturday. Wow it was fabulous, two tries to guess the PIN has failed. But the third time I was confident. My confidence got my card locked. Yes I was in Kanpur without a ticket, planning to come to Calicut with hardly Rs.1000 in my pocket.

This is the part I get lucky. A friend accompanying me offered to help. The ATM belonging to his bank was far away and there was a fair chance that we would miss our respective modes of transport. We started walking to catch an auto. And there it was in front of us a mobile ATM. We developed strategy to cover the whole screen from public view with our bodies and bags. This was done to cover his bank balance and therefore from probable future kidnappings maybe.I had asked him for only Rs.3000 but he forcefully handed me Rs.4000. This gesture was to be a life saver

Finally I took a UPSRTC bus to Delhi and a distance trains covered in 6 hours was covered in just 12 hours. I didn't care; I was in Delhi. The capital of India with enormous connectivity to all parts of the nation. My confidence grew. But I failed to realize that I was underestimating the population of India and their enormous buying power these days.

Hungry and dehydrated I stepped out of the bus. Last meal I had was the lunch from Kanpur. Whatever be it I will rush to the airport I thought. So with information from reliable sources that the airport was only 10 km from where I was, I set out to bargain with the autowallas. The bargain was purely one sided. I was awe struck by calls of 250's and 300's. I was too tired to bargain. I got into an auto who asked for Rs.200. After the journey I realized that it was OK to pay that much for a journey that took about an hour and may be about 30 km.

The airport had two terminals. Terminal A where Indian Airlines and Kingfisher flights took off and terminal B from where all other flights took off. I made a percentage call for terminal B. Approached the Jet lite counter and they said they were full. The spice flight didn't leave until the afternoon. The Air India counter said the Indian Airlines flight would cost Rs.5000. There was no food around. My only chance to get food was to get inside the terminal which was impossible without a ticket. Now I noticed that the battery level on my mobile was deep into the reds. With my mobile dead I didn't stand a chance to contact anyone.

I decided to wait till noon and try to find a hotel around. Things couldn't be worser than this so I decided to take it cool. I planned to roam around and find the cheapest flight. I found a bus that took me to Terminal A. Inquired at the Kingfisher terminal. The ticket was for Rs.5000. I said it was 3000 yesterday. Prompt came the reply "That was yesterday". Now I had run out of options. It felt great; I really felt free.

It was around 9.00 AM in the morning. To check for other flights I approached the Indian airlines counter. They said they had only a flight at 9.45 and that would cost me Rs.3600. I said I didn't get you. He said it would cost me Rs.3600. I paid and grabbed the ticket. Finally I got in the terminal. Freed my bladder, washed my face, had a coffee and sandwich. Went through the security checks and finally I was on a plane to Hydrabad.

My flight landed in Hydrabad. It was the newly inaugurated airport. The work was still going on in many parts of the airport. But the airport looked good; something of international standards. The new airport was about 30 Km from the city. I took a bus to the city. My friend picked me up in the city. Took a bath and had food. I was too tired to leave on saturday evening. So decided to book tickets to Mysore on sunday evening. The holiday buzz and software professionals made sure I was not going to get a seat even in a bus. Some how got hold of a ticket on a bus running on monday evening.

The weekend in Hydrabad was great. I had to leave the joy behind for the bus monday evening. 10km or so from Hydrabad the driver realizes that the headlights were not working. After lots of stops and dramas I was in Mysore on tuesday morning. Had breakfast and a great cofee and decided to take a bus at 1.30 P.M. I had time till then. So I decided to explore the palace city of Mysore. I roamed around and enjoyed it enormously but I was late. Had lots of water and little food. Was in the bus station by 3.30 PM. Couple of bus passed by full of passengers. I decided to play it safe and booked a ticket on the 5.45 bus to Cochin and got in. The bus crawled its way to Calicut. It stopped in an arrogant hotel to have dinner. I satisfied my hunger with a couple of Good days and coke.

The journey took me 7 hrs. I took an auto home. It took me a couple of more days to get over the hangover. It was fun I really enjoyed my journey. Thanks to my friends I was home in 4 days and 10 hours. Thinking back it was the best trip I ever had

In Case Of Emergency : ICE

2008-05-20T23:58:00.000-07:00

It's fairly simple. The concept is about turning your mobile into your life saver. Your phone contains 100's of contacts but only you know which ones are the dear and near ones. Whom to contact during an emergency?

For this reason we must have one or more telephone numbers stored under the name ICE

In case of emergency hospital staff or anyone would be able to quicly contact your kin, by simply dialing the number stored under ICE

For more than one contact simply enter ICE1. ICE2 etc.

Please make sure you do it now. IMMEDIATELY.

The Power of Words

2008-03-08T22:45:00.000-08:00

One man calls another a fool, and at this the other stands up and clenches his fists and lands a blow on his nose. Look at the power of words! There is a women weeping and miserable; another women comes along and speaks to her a few gentle words, the doubled up frame of the weeping women becomes straightened at once, her sorrow is gone and she already begins to smile. Think of the power of words! If simple words can pull a few tricks up its sleeve what about the words from the divine scriptures? So believe in the power of words and use it wisely.

The Candle and Candela

2008-02-20T08:54:00.000-08:00

You must have all heard of the usual metaphor “I burn like the wick of a candle”. Simply put, I am sacrificing my life and burning and dying; suffering a lot. By doing so I provide light or happiness to others. I am sacrificing my life for others.

Everyone's life is a candle. As in 'Dream Theatres' song 'Pull me under' lyrics “Every breath takes me one less to my last”. So we are all burning our time and dying with every moment from the moment we are born. But that does not mean we are born to die, does it? Now can someone tell me from your life experience that you had only sorrows whole life. You cant have a life without sorrows. Take sorrows as the price you have to pay to keep yourself happy.

Now lets talk about old dreams hunting. Yes old dreams do hunt, no denying that. But doesn't it diminish? Time is the best healer. Every sorrow fades away and yes new ones take their place. So we will always find means to keep our mind in grief. So sorrow will always be there. There will always be something bothering you. But its you who decide how much time you have to give to it. I feel its cowardice to keep feeding your mind with old griefs.

The world is full of opportunities. When you switch your brain to sad thoughts you miss a lot of knocks. For people who still cant keep away their mountain like sorrows there is a very simple technique. I picked it from 'The Zahir' by 'Paulo Coelho'. It really worked for me and few of my friends. It asks you to keep repeating your sorrows in all its details with others. Why do you fear to share? We are all humans and everyone can understand a co-being. When population is so great you can't sit on the excuse that you can't find a person to share. Talk to as many as you can.

Now lets get to the sacrifice part. Whom are you sacrificing for? The world, the society, parents. The whole world to some degree deep beneath is an ophthalmologist. Ha ophthalmologist : “I specialist” or simply egoistic. No one is worth your sacrifice. Even if you sacrifice do keep in mind that no one will come to share your suffering. The person you sacrificed for is least interested. Later he/she will only blame you for not adjusting.

Don't try to become the silent ever suffering loyal 'Hassan' of 'Khaled Hosseini's The Kite Runner'. Trust yourself and believe that it's you who make the society. Let the bright kites fly high and into the breeze.

Ones sacrifices are means to escape from responsibility, so when things go wrong you always have someone to point finger at. “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; . . . who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat”__ Theodore Roosevelt. Keep your thoughts simple and live. The world does not appreciate a silent sufferer, it always appreciate a man who has struggled to victory even if he does not win.

We have to see the world through our eyes not through the eye of the world. We have to believe in ourself and trust the supreme being who has created us so perfectly. So if you believe in him how can you think he went wrong? For those who don't believe in the supreme being don't you believe sorrows and happiness are of our own making.

So still burning like a candle? And still speaking of sacrifices. Be sure whom you are trying to please. You may not become who you want to be but you always have the choice to die trying.

When all doors are shut...

2008-02-02T09:45:00.000-08:00

When all doors are shut break the wall and make your way. But I am far too lazy. I like to sit in this dark enclosure and brood. Its a nice place. You are totally alone; not even your shadow bothers to follow.

An Ordeal Into Self

2007-12-08T05:52:00.000-08:00

When I look back what I miss most are the weekend trips. Lots of trekking and lots of sight seeing in the motherly comforts of nature. The memories of the last and the best trek to Raigad fort is still fresh. Just the thoughts of it reckons smiles.

Life should really be like a adventurous trek, purely driven by instincts. There are no big decisions only quick ones. No time to sit and think over across a table and shuttle between 'may be' and 'may be not'. Just follow your split second instincts. That too in the arms of nature you are pretty much relaxed.

Instincts are Gods means to communicate because they lack the human thoughts and fear. Fear of loosing, fear of pleasing and all sorts of fears. Instincts are pure and raw. It's what your true heart says is right.

What we all forget in our lives is to live the true heart. Like a child. We adults look into lots of factors before acting. We live for these factors not for ourselves.

At this juncture when most of my friends are entering or are in the threshold of entering married life, I would suggest you to live life for yourself. Don't live to please your better half. It will be too late when you realize that you have lost yourself. Greater pain will be inflicted when your spouse leaves you too; for when you loose yourself you turn into an object devoid of value much like gold to king Midas.

Bring out the adventurer in you and try to live life for yourself than to go around trying to live convincing the society.

TVS vs. Bajaj: An Interesting Battle on Cards

2007-09-05T00:05:00.000-07:00

India’s second and third largest motor bike manufactures are out in the open battling over intellectual property rights. This is pretty new for a country like India but pretty common in the United States.

It all began with TVS announcing the launch of 9 new vehicles into its product lineup. It included a 125cc model called the Flame. It is to spearhead TVS in the growing 125cc segment. TVS claims to have made the most fuel efficient engine of its class using a new technology which they call CC-VTi. It is a three valve cylinder with 2 inlet ports and a single exhaust port. TVS calls the inlet ports Swirl port and Power port. The swirl port provides enough turbulence to increase combustion efficiency. When the engine speed increases the power port kicks in to provide more fuel. The engine also has two spark plugs to increase combustion efficiency.

Now the much talked about war horse behind Bajaj success is the DTSi technology. It also has two spark plugs to attain higher combustion efficiency. Bajaj is also planning to launch a new 125cc bike on September 9th called the Exceed with what they call the DTS-Si. The extra S stands for swirl. They also have the DTS-Fi which is an engine with fuel injection.

Now Bajaj claims that through patent number 195904 which was approved on July 7 2005 they have the IP rights on small engines with two spark plugs. And hence they are planning to sue TVS for IP violation on their new bike Flame if launched. Bajaj expects that TVS will not launch the new bike. Bajaj has also announced that it has made the matter clear and it will not comment until the launch(only then they can legally sue TVS for IP violation).

TVS has replied strongly to this. They say patent no: 195904 filled by Bajaj for DTSi on third July 2003 was modified on 5th November 2004 and it was this modified request that was granted patent. TVS claims twin spark plugs in engines are “Prior art”. It’s been with the industry for ages. The modified patent request has a phrase: “engine with two valves” and hence it was for this they were granted patent; for using two spark plugs in engines with two valves. The Flame engine has three valves and hence TVS claims there is no question of IP violation. Further more TVS is planning to sue Bajaj for damage to their reputation though a public statements for an amount of Rs.250 crore.

Now using twin spark plugs in engines as TVS claims is prior art. Bajaj has definitely worked quite hard perfecting the technology on smaller engines. They have every right to patent and protect it. But the patent is not for using twin spark plugs but using it on small engines. The way small engine is defined in the patent is by using the term “engine with two valves”. The new TVS engine has three valves and hence I feel there is no violation of IP. Bajaj definitely must have applied for patent for their new DTS-Si or may be in the process of applying. You can’t patent Swirl because it’s a natural phenomenon. Only thing you can patent is the way you attain swirl. Anyone including TVS can induce swirl in their engine without Bajaj’s permission. If marketing words are what Bajaj care for expect a DTS-Ti (Tumble induced) and DTS-Sqi (Squish induced) engines soon from them. As a mechanical engineer I appreciate the radical work done by TVS team in their new engine, port and manifold design. The legal melodrama is sure to be staged. It’s sure that Bajaj is feeling the heat of the competition. Let’s hope the competition turns healthy and ultimately the customer is benefited with better products.

Seeds of Change

2007-09-04T07:01:00.000-07:00

It's one thing to say and another thing to realize. You know what I just realized: "The world doesn't need me; it is the same even without me". It was hard to realize and it has gradually sunk in with pain. This has changed me and how much only time can say. Life is a miracle but i will never appreciate it. I am happy that every breath leaves me one less to my last.

Let's Talk About Ethics

2007-08-02T03:36:00.000-07:00

The atmosphere between Ferrari and McLaren has gone from bad to worse. It's expected to dip even lower during the course of this weekend in Hungary.Maybe the drivers are mature enough to keep the anger away from the tracks.

I have always appreciated the Ferrari way of making the line between FIA design regulation and the actual formula one car thinner. They have come up with really great innovative ideas to improve performance within the strict frameworks of regulations. Many a times history has it that FIA framed new regulations to strip Ferrari of their performance enhancements. It should make Ferrari proud. If Ferrari was breaking the law then they must have been disqualified. These things are uncommon with McLaren these days but during their golden days in F1 McLaren were no aliens to such new regulations. So I think it's unfair from the part of McLaren to blame Ferrari for using an illegal car.

If these are McLaren's strategy to divert mounting pressure from the technical information leak case, then I feel it aint gonna work. Ferrari engineer handing on the information to the McLaren engineer is totally unethical and the McLaren counterpart was definitely involved deeply. There surely are more people behind the scenes. We will never know whether McLaren ever has used these technical information on their cars. As long as Ferrari cant prove it, the FIA cant take any decision against McLaren. I truly standby the FIA judgment.

Such incidents at such competitive levels reminds us we are all selfish people. Ferrari is after FIA to strip McLaren of points to get a lead in the constructors championship. Healthy competition will always aid technology. Lets see how the season unfolds. If Ferrari could improve on their reliability the competition should be close but such incidents will always leave a permanent stain.

What am I Doing?

2007-08-02T01:47:00.000-07:00

Know not what I am doing. The road ahead is diverse but feel too boring to think about it. Sort of settled into a rhythm. The sun wakes up to watch me asleep and i watch the sun going to sleep. What happens between these I don't have much idea. Rather there is nothing happening. I have been brooding away swept by an invisible hand. There I go the truth is the hands belong to the one called Mr.Laziness. My best friend these days. What may become of me I don't know. Time is running out and soon the last tram will go past. Am I waiting for some miraculous signal? Think theres nothing like that, those are thoughts from folk tales.

Its been six months and 21 days since I have been lets say unemployed. Studies for GRE..ahhh not a bit just bought a couple of books downloaded a dozen more. Then whats the block? Good that I am not committed these days otherwise the load must have crushed me and forced me into a mental asylum and why waste the life of another fellow being with my never ending surreal miseries. Thoughts are very difficult to control. They took me to philosophy and it became a way of living for me rather a part of outlook. Now it's merely a tool to hide behind; a tool to create excuses.

None of my friends will understand me. All think it's a drama and I will always study behind the curtain. I don't blame them seldom they must have seen a transition in man and its rather difficult to understand unless it's become really bad. Sometimes I think that I have lost the motivation factor. When you think too much about life everything becomes meaning less and you loose your motivation. Maybe another excuse. I have lost the ability to distinguish between reality, facts and excuses.

Most difficult is to answer the queries of your family, relatives, friends and neighbors. The confusion prevails and I don't have it in me to bite through it. The last glimmer of hope has long vanished and its too old to retrieve. Like many this is the start of a great fall but I am sad I could not fight the good battle before the fall. I have let it go far too easy.

The Candor

2007-04-02T10:05:00.000-07:00

I do not need anyone to live my life but it’s so much better with everyone around.

Face to Face With Solitude

2007-01-20T09:23:00.000-08:00

Four walls a roof and a floor and that is what I am caught between. No it’s not a jail. There is a computer next to me too. No it’s not a cubicle it’s my room my beloved room, where I have long lounged to be. Now that I am here things seem different.

It’s been almost a fortnight since I am home. I quit my job for it gave me money but no satisfaction or is it that my ego could not stand the faster growths of the ones next to you? I was bored of my monotonous work. And working in shifts meant skipping lots of meals, changing sleep cycles and a totally unsettled life.

People around me were working just to bite away their time just fill the day and go home for they did not put their heart into it. I could not do so, so I decided to bid adieu. All friends around me advised me against it. They advised me to look for another job or write my GRE or GATE and quit the job only when I had a real solid alternative. But I was too tired to continue. My mind was somewhere else in a distant field called Computational Fluid Dynamics (CFD).

I found someone who was working on the same field. Talking with him was fun. He opened gates to a marvelous world. I felt I should have long time back embarked upon this path. Then I was lucky to gain entry to a workshop on the same subject. It enriched me well. It brought me down to earth from a magical world. I felt really at home and felt like working was fun. Those were one of the best days I ever had.

Then it was the year end. My company had a 5 day holiday. This was rare for a company that had only seven holidays other than the fifty two Sundays. Everyone took the opportunity to go home. Rest rushed to meet friends to welcome the New Year in style. Goa was the favorite spot. What I would do these 5 days I did not know.

There was none around me. The mess was closed that meant a long walk to have food at least four times a day. I filled my cupboard with what my friends like to call ‘junk food’. That solved my problem of food and I hardly left the comforts of the room in those five days. Those five days I would like to say that I was ‘hibernating’.

Then the end of my one month notice period came to an end. I was relived of all responsibilities. The workers sent me off with immense love. I will never forget those moments. Then one fine morning I picked my bag and said good bye to the beautiful city of Pune. I boarded my train from Kalyan. I found myself amidst an elderly league. Some were reading and rereading the news paper. One was with a bible and others simply gazing out of their windows. Many a times I tried to strike a conversation but with my poor rapport success was far to reckon. I tried to read a novel that I carried along. But my mind did not stick there. I left the compartment to the door to feel the draft on my face. This did not keep me interested for long. Nothing helped me. Somehow it was morning and I got down at Calicut station. I always used to enjoy my train journeys. But I should admit this was the worst I ever had.

I reached home. The door was left ajar. They knew I was there none came to welcome me. I knew I was an unwelcome man. I must tell you this; I don’t live with my parents. They are settled in Abu Dhabi. My uncle lives in my house now with his wife and son. I took my luggage and crawled to my room on the first floor. I unpacked few personals and got fresh.

At around eight o’clock my uncle left home with his son. Then at nine o’clock aunt left asking me to lock the front door. Food was left on the dinning table for me. I took the much needed rest and ate my lunch. Idled away some time in front of the television. Then started playing some games on my PC. A little after four o’clock aunt came with her son. They were busy with their personal fights and works. At night uncle arrived and they had their on personal discussion of the happenings of the day in the privacy of their bed room. Everyone has their own perils to share and discuss. Then came a call for the dinner. I sat down for my dinner had my food and left for my room. Went online checked all the mails and surfed the net a bit. I called it a day.

Every day passed exactly in the same fashion. And on the weekends I leave home early and return late night for I have to attend to some business that interests my parents. How can someone live so long without a word spoken? But for the phone calls my mom makes to advise me everyday I would have gone totally insane.

I had been in similar situation before but not this severe. But at those times I never felt this bad. A feeling of emptiness fills me. No books or games seem to interest me. I am spending my time more like a zombie. I always loved to be alone. I always kept myself busy and had fun interacting with the different energies of nature.

I called my friends to spend some time talking. But they are all too busy to hear to my sober stories. For none has time to hear about others perils if he is not your enemy. A few promised to give me a call back when they are free. It filled my heart with that glimmer of hope. But I must have known before all, I who go around advising others not to expect anything and that expectations are milestones to grief. I should have better known not to expect. But at such difficult time even “Gandalf the white” wisest of all hoped and expected and I was more human.

Few dearer ones I tried to contact again and again calling them at times they mentioned they were free. They had scores to talk to me. I listed to them their joys and their life. I was happy for them. They asked my opinion about the decisions they had taken. I was glad that they consulted me for the friend they thought I am. When they finished they were tired and fancied a nice sleep, my story was to wait. Let all the forces of nature keep them ignorant of mine or similar perils.

My search is on for it’s my destiny and mine alone. The universe conspires or not I will fight but it would have been easier with someone by the side. Gone are those days and days of such expectations. As I always believe destiny is a skeleton and it’s our efforts that add flesh and skin to it giving it the final form. Hope such hard times will subside and I can survive it with the hope of a ‘cast away’.

New Year Musings

2007-01-01T10:14:00.000-08:00

Because it has lived its life intensely
the parch of grass still attracts the gaze of passers-by.
and they do this as well as they can.
The white lily, blooming unseen in the valley,
does not need to explain itself to anyone;
It lives merely for beauty.
Men, however, cannot accept that ‘merely’.

If tomatoes wanted to be melons,
they would look ridiculous.
I am always amazed
that so many people are concerned
with wanting to be what they are not;
what’s the point of making yourself looking ridiculous?

You don’t always have to pretend to be strong,
there’s no need to prove all the time that everything is going well,
you shouldn’t be concerned about what other people are thinking,
cry if you need to,
it’s good to cry out all your tears
(because only then will you be able to smile again).

Mitsuo Aida (1924-91)
Japaneese poet & calligrapher

Malshej: Where I Felt God

2006-10-06T09:43:00.000-07:00

When knock of an exciting day ahead reckons, you wake up from the deepest of the slumber and rush through your morning routine. With the bag packed and hanging on my posterior I was all ready for the adventure. Ten of us set out to explore the Shayadiris.

The sun was playing hide and seek behind the clouds. The rain like a chameleon was showing its colours of drizzle, heavy down pour and dry spells. This was to continue for the whole day. We went past our factory in Chakan with a roar, then rocketing through the wide Pune-Nashik highway onto the Alephata-Kalyan highway. We choose a small hotel from the large number of hotels available on both sides of the highway to take our breakfast.

First glimpses of the Shayadiri in the monsoon felt like a peacock with its wings spread wide, dancing after the rain. The beauty was such that even a human would dance. The lush green mountains, the water falls and the aroma of the air will never cease to soothe human minds.

The great backdrop

Out of the vehicle in suitable gear we were greeted by a valley on one side a mountain on the other with enormous number of water falls. The mountains stripped regularly with water falls were giving the illusion of a large zebra crossing. A peep into the valley reveled dense flora and channels of water wading through them.

Games of nature

Joy of venturing into the unknown

Every step forward reveled something more beautiful, more exciting. It was early afternoon. The crowd was thin and grew slim as we moved further. The trek started from a plateau like region. We reached the edge of the plateau and found a small path winding down through the trees. The path was dangerous with steep valley at the side and land very slippery. But the effort was worth we were introduced to a whole new world, a world of meadows hardly touched by human torrents and ecosystem left on its own.

Nothing but marvelous

We started walking around and found streams and valleys and what not, just nature at the best. Small yellow and white flowers embedded the grass cover. The feeling was of refreshment as if enormous amounts of energy were available from some untapped reservoir within. We started discussions of building a house over there and to stay in it for ever, sitting in the lawn and enjoying the beauty for ever.

After long strolls we reached an extreme point which overlooked a deep valley and had no paths that could take us any further. On the other side of the valley was a big waterfall. The water was flowing down from it but alas it was not going down. Half way down the water is carried away by the wind. And you could see the water rise back above as clouds. A sight that I will never forget for a lifetime. The joy I felt, never before had I felt so. A unique feeling of the supreme surfaced. Words are incomplete to mention feeling like this. We spend some time there and then the strings of time forced us to part. Places like this question our sanity for where we live and where we could have.

What everyone saw

We walked all the way back and had some snacks. Then we proceeded to where there were huge crowds of people. There were large numbers of waterfalls flowing onto the road or the roadsides. Everyone has parked their vehicles there and was dancing in the falls. The crowd was huge and noisy. Many were drunk. We waded through the crowds and few of us enjoyed the bath in the falls. Now it was time to leave. Say good bye to a place where I felt God.

Friends Are For Ever

2006-07-31T09:47:00.000-07:00

A scintillating thought rather intoxicating thought that often gives a surrealistic reinforcement and leaves you meandering the terrains of emotions. Those last days of collage, the cries of don’t go, those heavy looks of ‘will we meet again?’ are still echoing fresh in my heart.

We reach home with a heavy heart. Spend a few days crawling about. We remember those golden days and times spend with our friends. With the advent of modern technology keeping in touch is no big deal. Dial our friends and both agree how much we miss the collage and recollect those large chunks of memory that are alive within us. When the day passes I couldn’t quite figure out what happens; either memory fades or we get bored of talking history. Now we start talk of getting together or about organizing a mass get together. Sometimes we even manage to meet a few, be it coincidence or planning.

Slowly the turning point approaches. Now its time to pack our bags, say good bye and leave your family to earn. For few days we are busy settling down with the new environments get a new mobile number and some of us get new internal company email ids. The torrent of collage friendship now starts loosing strength. We send our new number to a few whose number you still have. Some receive them. A few of them manage to update their phone book. Hence the torrent grows week and week shredding friends exponentially on its way to earn a leaving.

We send our friends mails regularly. Some reply, others take a long time. Sometimes we read the mails and often find no time to reply and postpone the replying past to some free time in the future. Very often we find ourselves thinking why should I take initiative if they are not? There are huge numbers of e-mails forwards roaming through your company internal network. Now you make a list of all your friends e-mail ids and start forwarding them. On being asked ‘why only forwards?’ the most common answer I received was, forwards are a sign that say I miss you (translate it to I remember you) and I am too busy to send personal mails.

The next best thing that ever happened was the concept of Orkut and scraps. It’s fairly simple and you get to find what your friends are upto and put in small scraps. At least for the fight of popularity I know people who keep scrapping everyone. It helps strengthening the torrent to some levels.

By now a large abyss is already build. The torrent has transformed into a gentle draft. We now find more friends at work place both in professional and personal front. They get married and even we. I am an illiterate to comment on what happens after marriage. In the manufacturing industry we always reject a cracked part. It can never be reworked. How able are we to sustain relationships without cracks and how long?

Maybe friendship never stays forever. You may disagree and say that you have a few close friends whom you are still close to and keep in constant touch. But just ask yourself is it the same even now? Does the relationship come natural or do you have to sacrifice to keep it up? Every new day we find new people and make new friends. Old memories remain forever or should I say till we catch amnesia. Thoughts of them bring enormous joy with them. Occasionally we meet someone from our past. We talk enjoy and rebuild the lost glamour and bonds.

Maybe we meet our friends because there is a purpose behind it. With acquaintance we get transformed and even they. I believe destiny is a choice and it’s after all our choice whether we continue the relationships or not.

Plight of Ajintha

2006-07-28T11:37:00.000-07:00

Since when did I start seeing the morning sun rise on a leisurely Sunday morning? It’s been years and not even the brightest sunny afternoon could wake me up from the clutches of dreams (A world where everyone is what they want to be). My Sundays have ceased to be reserved for dreams. Every Sunday is expected with delight and weekdays spend planning for a marvelous Sunday trip.

This Sunday the plan was to visit the marvelous Ajintha caves (they call it Ajintha rather than Ajantha here and I thought to use it with the hope that some day they will follow suit with Bangalooru or Mumbai for that matter). The wheels were rolling and what followed was a luscious treat to the eyes. As always the nature was at its best. It’s always at its best; I wonder how even a fierce lightning or massive wave seems fabulous.

Taste of rural India

A snap from the ghats

Meandering through the ghats we reached our destination. After an early lunch the group was taken to the caves by a Maharastra tourism bus, a short and comfortable ride. A peep into the mobile suggested that I am in an out of coverage area. Ah! What a relief. I feel mobiles are an invasion to ones privacy in spite of the diverse features that they come with these days. Prepared with enough food and water the group was ready for the long ordeal ahead.

View of the caves

The mere site of the caves was a delight. The caves cut into the mountains spread in front of my eyes. The placed seemed similar to Ellora and maybe that is why these two places are always paired together in spite of the large distance separating them.

Bridge to the past

A place from the history books, I am finally here. Took a snap of the map for future reference and moved into the first cave. There was a board placed outside. It read “Use of Flash or Stand not allowed inside the cave”. The guard outside explained that the flashes actually destroyed the paintings. “No stand” maybe that was to prevent any kind of photography (How is one supposed to take photos in low light without high exposure times).

Setting foot inside what greeted us was a dimly lit cave with paintings hardly visible. Chemical regeneration of the paintings was in progress. It had commenced about a year back and not even the first cave stood completed. Most of the parts of the cave was covered with plaster. Out of what remained of the walls and ceilings I could make out copious parts of wall painting or should I say a lost past.

Padmapani

Some paintings left behind

The first cave gave a glimpse of the Padmapani, the widely used symbolic representation of Ajintha. Other than paintings there were beautiful statues and marvelous stone work cut through the rocks mostly of Lord Buddha. Cave after cave the realization of a history at the verge of demise grew. How long is this going to last? Will another generation get to catch a glimpse of those great days of Indian architecture? Here was a structure which stood tall through out history about to collapse any moment like a tower of playing cards.

What decorated the caves

Tired after the tiring climb and travel through the caves we decided to take a look at the valley beneath. Walking by the river it took us to a beautiful waterfall. Refreshed after an unplanned bath we started our return journey. Walking through the stalls put up mainly to loot foreign tourists offered me nothing interesting.

Tired

I climbed back into our means of transportation with a heavy heart after a glimpse of how a national heritage is preserved. A testimonial of our past. Rather of the times to come where the past is of no importance. What drives human is only the future or thought of self, nothing else matters. Does it?

Spontaneous Human Combustion

2005-12-11T08:39:00.000-08:00

A breathtaking phenomenon

This is about some stuff that had a deep impact on my outlook and the way I think. I share this bitter pill to swallow here with you all. Some pictures and material in this article are really disturbing. Nevertheless I think it’s a fact all should be familiar with. After a tiring day I was watching TV when National Geographic channel took my attention. It was to be my first interaction with the phenomenon. Later searches online enriched me with lots of interesting insight.

What is spontaneous human combustion or in short SHC? Spontaneous human combustion is the sudden burning of a person's body or complete incineration of the body for no apparent reason. The flames burn very hot and are localized. They destroy most of the body but leave objects in close proximity to the person relatively unburned. The human being is turned into a lump of ash. Not even bones are spared. In some cases the legs and hands remain unburned and the skull reduces to a lump hardly the size of an orange.

An SHC victim

Dr. Bentley : Another Victim

Remains of Mrs. M H Reeser-1951 Florida

Another pool of unexplained human ash

No of victims:

1950's - 11 cases
1960's - 7 cases
1970's - 13 cases
1980's - 22 cases

Over the past 300 years, there have been more than 200 reports of persons burning to a crisp for no apparent reason.

Some Typical Cases

Mrs. Mary Reeser, 67, was found in her apartment on the morning of July 2, 1951, reduced to a pile of ashes, a skull, and a completely undamaged left foot. All that remained of the 175-pound woman and her chair was a few blackened seat springs, a section of her backbone, a shrunken skull the size of a baseball, and one foot encased in a black stain slipper just beyond the four-foot circle. Plus about 10 pounds of ashes. The police report declared that Mrs. Reeser went up in smoke when her highly flammable rayon-acetate nightgown caught fire, perhaps because of a dropped cigarette. But one medical examiner stated that the 3,000-degree heat required to destroy the body should have destroyed the apartment as well. In fact, damage was minimal - the ceiling and upper walls were covered with soot. No chemical accelerants, incidentally, were found.

On May 18, 1957, Anna Martin, 68, of West Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, was found incinerated, leaving only her shoes and a portion of her torso. The medical examiner estimated that temperatures must have reached 1,700 to 2,000 degrees, yet newspapers two feet away were found intact.

On December 5, 1966, the ashes of Dr. J. Irving Bentley, 92, of Coudersport, Pennsylvania, were discovered by a meter reader. Dr. Bentley's body apparently ignited while he was in the bathroom and burned a 2-1/2-by-3-foot hole through the flooring, with only a portion of one leg remaining intact. Nearby paint was not damaged.

What is common in all SHC cases?

Eighty percent of the victims are female.
The body is very badly burned, but the room the body was found in is pretty much intact except for a fine layer of soot.
The torso, including the chest, abdomen and hips tend to be totally consumed, sparing portions of the extremities and the head - the clothing can also be intact.
The victim was always on their own - no shouts or screams could ever be heard

Theories about Spontaneous Human Combustion

Alcoholism - many Spontaneous Human Combustion vicitms have been alcoholics. But experiments in the 19th century demonstrated that flesh impregnated with alcohol will not burn with the intense heat associated with Spontaneous Human Combustion.
Deposits of flammable body fat - Many victims have been overweight - yet others have been skinny
Divine Intervention - Centuries ago people felt that the explosion was a sign from God of divine punishment.
Build-up of static electricity - no known form of electrostatic discharge could cause a human to burst into flames.
An explosive combination of chemicals can form in the digestive system - due to poor diet.
Larry Arnold's theory that sometimes human cells are hit by a mysterious particle, the pyrotron, that causes a nuclear chain reaction inside a person's body.
Another theory links SHC to lightning balls that cause the human body to be turned into ashes.

A more economical and reasonable theory of how human bodies burn in rooms without having the entire room engulfed in flames is the idea of the wick effect. The ignition point of human fat is low and to get the fire going would require an external source. Once ignited, however, a "wick effect" from the body's fat would burn hot enough in certain places to destroy even bones. To prove that a human being might burn like a candle, Dr. John de Haan of the California Criminalistic Institute wrapped a dead pig in a blanket, poured a small amount of gasoline on the blanket, and ignited it. Even the bones were destroyed after five hours of continuous burning. The fat content of a pig is very similar to the fat content of a human being. The damage to the pig, according to Dr. De Haan "is exactly the same as that from supposed spontaneous human combustion."

Epilogue

The wick effect requires hours of slow burning. No cry of panic and pain in these times is unexplained. Also it only explains how it proceeds and fails to explain the cause for start of ignition. The phenomenon still continues as clear as mud.

In spite of all our progress in science there are things still far beyond our reach. We are all babe in the woods in the hands of nature and our knowledge no more than a drop in the ocean.

Rendered Speechless

2005-11-01T09:30:00.000-08:00

This is about the trip seven of us made to the famous Ellora caves. The pictures say it all.

The glimpses of the journey through the ghat somewhere near Daullatabad fort.

There are numerous caves made during different eras in Ellora. All of them are cut out from a single rock.

A Broken Promise

2005-10-24T10:44:00.000-07:00

Woken up by the disturbing noise of an alarm clock everyday I expect the day to be great there after. Mornings greeted by the newspaper is a real spice to the day injecting in us some new dose of enthusiasm . Some get it wet, others on their face but luckily for me I get it quietly under my hostel door. The fact is that the comfort ends there.

All Indian currencies promise the bearer the equivalent sum. In my case its Rs. 2.00 every morning for my beloved "Times of India" (Only choice).

The Promise

Here are the glimpses of what I get:

On the fine Saturday morning of 22nd October I received a 20 page newspaper (it's what they call). I was anxiously waiting for news on the after effects of the tragic earthquake. What greeted me was not a news paper but an "ad paper" with news to fill the gaps. With the help of my scale I started measuring the area. The result a whooping 58% of the paper was covered by advertisements.

The story doesn't end here. Now I shall give you a glimpse of remaining 42%. It's filled with stories similar to what is shown below.

I would have been satisfied if they mentioned what was the new brand at least. You might be thinking this is from some page inside. You are absolutely right but how good is the frontal view. What is given below is the front page of 18th October 2005 Pune edition.

Front page of a reputed newspaper

Such mistakes on the front pages of a widely read newspaper is a shame to us all Indians. In this fast moving world we all tend to forget that "Its quality that drives quantity" and quantity without quality is short living.

Beyond The Hair Pin Curve

2005-09-23T11:59:00.000-07:00

You never know what is coming your way

A batch of 44 newly joined employees of my company started for an outbound training program part of the induction program. If you compared people with fruits then it was an ideal mixed fruit shake. The mix included both graduate trainees as well as management trainees, mix of gentlemen and ladies, from all parts of the nation; truly diverse. The trip started on a high note on a Thursday afternoon from the hostel premises. It was to be made in a company bus with its reputation for excellent suspensions and passenger comfort. The level is beyond challenge.

The wheels of our means of transportation or in lay man’s words the bus started rolling. The response was instantaneous. The howls would have frightened any wolf nearby. In a residential area it would only wake up sleeping babies much to the trouble of their mothers. Howls transformed into rhythmic beats and slowly music began to embrace the lips of my co-passengers. The wild lion was tamed much to the delight of those who had decided that we would sit and tolerate (only choice) this circus.

The means of transport took a turn and here we were in a six lane road. Six lane road in India? You are kidding!!!! Yes, the Mumbai-Pune expressway. The bus was in full throttle. Other cars buzzed passed us. Those we could manage to catch were real huge trucks and public transport busses. To the delight or dismay, left to them, every girl or women in those buses received their part of appreciation. A fine sunny day and suddenly it was dark, like Lord Voldemort had cast his spell on us. The tunnels were huge. A few camera flashes a few monkeys jumping it were bright again.

The next turn we were on Mumbai-Goa highway, with very mighty mountains with all sorts of shapes, left to your imagination. Means of transportation came to a halt. It was for some refreshment, more importantly to let go the relief value.

Back in the bus the circus continued. Some throats fell silent owing to the fatigue. Slowly the darkness crept in and now the ride was bumpy. Of the little that we could make out it was some sort of a jungle. The excitement crept in. Creative adventure stories were aired. But for it the air was clean. Not even a mobile signal and none boasted “My network is better”. All mobiles gave up, some people took more time.

The bus came to the final halt it was well passed 9.00. Human songs gave way to the crickets. In dim light a few figures appeared, those were to be our care takers for the two days to come. All assembled with their luggage. Eight groups were called out each directed to a tent. First impression:”Wow awesome”. All were asked to assemble in the command house for dinner at sharp 9.30. Who imagined sharp was the most important word for the days to come.

First impression

First impression continues…

Back in the tent a bed was chosen, luggage unpacked and facilities evaluated. The tent was good. The glow of the lantern brought in a unique atmosphere. The bathrooms and toilets were made of tarpaulin, leaving your self to the mercy of your tent mates. An European closet in the jungle. It was beyond expectation.

Dinner was served, and to everyone’s delight it was really great. Then arrived the gulab jamuns, where? They just dematerialized in no time. There were healthy competitors in all weight groups, light weight, heavy weight, super heavy weight etc.

All assembled, there was talks, talks of torture in store, ready to be unleashed on us but everything was to be a surprise. The minds started to wander on all possibilities. Each tent was now asked to introduce and present a bit of an entertainer. The smarter ones were rewarded with push ups. No no no the ladies had only sit ups which they obviously performed due to excessive audience demand, thanks to the Ravana like laugh of VM.

It was time to disperse. The wakeup call was set at 5.30 sharp in the morning. Chit chats in the tents slowly gave way to the tired snores.

It must have been around 5.00 when a group of geese was eagerly waiting for the sun rise. Their eager shrieks did manage to get attentions of quite a few tired men. Pillows shifted positions from under the head to above them. Peacocks wasted no time in joining the geese. The pillows were now not thick enough to push me back to the slumber that I badly needed. I walked through my morning routines spiced up by the warm Jacuzzi. 6.40 sharp was the time to assemble for the morning PT.

Most made it in time but for the rest they joined after their warm up of 25 push ups. Two long rows were formed, one arm distance taken memories of those bygone school days rushed through me. Warm ups were done. Exercises followed one, two, three, four… one, two, three, four… and for the last time one, two, three, four… change…change…change…. How many? Really lost count.

I am all tired I am done with this. The ring continued to ring loud in my mind “Change”. I can’t go on anymore. Four years of engineering education had injected in me heavy doses of laziness from the toe till the top. I was preparing to give up. I looked up at the instructor. All my thoughts crumbled like a biscuit inside the mouth of a dog. “Change” and this time it was to jump and try to touch both your knees on your chest. I could hardly mange to rise my feet of the ground leave alone touching the chest. I tried my best. My muscles wouldn’t obey. Everyone was exhausted all started moving and jumping like a drunken.

The warm up was done. What that was a warm up? “Inhale through your nose exhale through your mouth, take long steps and run” What!!! No more questions asked and all were on their heels for a five kilometer run. After a few initial steps all started walking. Shouts of “Don’t slow down” were aired in commanding voices. None but dead could ignore them. Almost a kilometer done we were stopped many more exercises done all were puffing and limping. Half way through the jog back again exercises; the instructor ensured that no muscle remained unstretched. The sun was out by now. A supernatural morning quite wasted on us. Nearly back where we started again exercises. You might be thinking this is beyond limits this should end now. It did. All sat down relaxed facing the sun after an ordeal that lasted for little less than 90 minutes.

Just forgot what hope was

After a short walk that took long most managed to get some part or other inside the tent. There was pin drop silence. No muscles moved. The silence was occasionally broken by the cries of the peacocks. None cared. Time to finish breakfast was sharp 8.30. With the heads cooled and limps crying everyone crawled for breakfast. The food was delicious and some even managed to lift it from the plate onto that distant place called the mouth.

Breakfast managed all were back in the command house. Counts of one two one two divided us into two groups. We were to name over selves bring up with a slogan and present them. Rockers and Jwala came victorious from the zillions of possible names. A drawing was to be made by each team with each member contributing a single line. Picasso or Dali couldn’t have done better. They were abstract to all dimensions and the explanations that followed gave it more. It was like an ant hill seen as Mount Everest. Then each others drawings were criticized. Teams even went into DNA levels, to its carbon atoms and even noticed the fourth electron in the outer shell missing. All were right back on their heels this time to appreciate your opponents drawing. How quick could people change, it really amazed me.

Wow what a relief

This interesting exercise kept us occupied for a good part of the forenoon section. It was heaven compared to what we had in the morning. With the muscles feeling relaxed it was time to leave. The bus was waiting outside for more surprises to unfold.

It was rappelling followed by rock climbing. The experience that everyone had was wonderful. Rappelling was all to do with the initial anxiety after that its real fun. Rock climbing was more challenging and takes a good amount of energy to reach the top. The whole team went through these one by one. All had their own fears and the way all felt was distinct. It was nearly 2.00 in the after noon when we were done. All stomachs were crying for food. The bus took us back to the command house. Delicious food was served. At least now the hand knew where the mouth was.

Rappelling

Rock climbing obviously

Post lunch session we were introduced to a game called cobweb. I front of us was a rope structure which resembled a cobweb. The team was to spend each member through it one by one without touching the ropes. All the gaps started looking like hardly an Anil Das could pass through. The spirits were high; each wanted them to be heard. Timed passed by it was only getting louder. Calls of lets do this was heard. The more powerful was sending the smaller ones from one side to another. Finally a few handful stout people remained. The work was satisfactory.

Great work team. Come on you can do it.

This was followed by MAT. As the name it was more of mental test. A problem was posed. All brains were busy now. Trials were taken. Many lost hope. “This cannot be done” we heard many say. Of the 30 minutes given 20 minutes were through. Hopes started disappearing like a drop of water in the mighty sea. In that vital moment, thanks to the R&D team they came up with a solution. It was well executed and in little under a minute left the problem was perfectly solved. The team was delighted.

A delighted team after the event

The sun was now covered by the rain laden clouds and they poured down heavily. It was real delight to watch the illusion crafted by rain and shadow. We all cooled down and a party atmosphere was settling down on us. A campfire was planned for the night and each team was to perform a skit. There was hardly any time to relax. A skit was planned and roles assigned. The performance was left to the creativity of the performer. Slowly but unknowingly darkness engulfed us. It was show time. The fire was set. The atmosphere was great. Both teams performed their skits. It was excellent and in such short notice everybody needed a good round of applause. It was followed by some beautiful voices performing some great songs. Most forgot their aching muscles and were dancing to the great tunes of Punjabi music.

Glimpses of a great evening

The next morning the geese were awake by 4.30 and you are left with no choice. All assembled by 6.30 for the morning torture. Previous nights sleep only made things worse, all muscles were crying for care. By now I perfectly knew (felt) which muscle I use when I walk climb etc. as good as a physio. The mechanisms of muscle movement were like kinder garden lessons. Late comers were as usual rewarded with a duck walk and then the usual push ups. With the counts taken the warm up began followed by the exercises. The run was longer today and it included a run backward, sideward, and all ways. Then lot more exercises. Lots of stretching which even included the tip of your finger. Thank god I survived to tell you this story. Everyone somehow went through the breakfast hoping that the day ahead would be better. It can’t be worse than this for sure.

The team scores were fairly even. Jwala had an upper hand. The next event was to be the decider. The big event for the day was the treasure hunt in an unknown territory. A map and a compass were provided to each team with the first clue. All minds started pondering. Many an interpretations were given. None were satisfactory. The team started moving to some doubtful places. We were getting it all wrong. Some more thoughts a few words of wisdom; yes the first clue was cracked. We reached the place in our means of transport.

On to the second clue

The second clue took us to a rope bridge and the next clue waited for us on the other end.

The trip across

Next clue was solved instantaneously. But with the help of bad map readings and worse decisions we enjoyed lots of nature around it was just wonderful.

Nature at it’s best

Lost in the search

Once the place was found (it too really long and big toll on us) next clue was solved. The walk was a steep climb. It led us to the next clue which ultimately leads us to where we began. Yes we were back. Just that the other team was here 45 minutes back. Jwala were the winners. We proceeded for a dip in the stream nearby. How soothing it was. Splashing and jumping brought memories flowing of those great weekends in Kerala.

There is nothing better than this

Few more talks and it was time to leave. We bid farewell with great pleasure. May be it was the first time in my life that I felt happy for leaving some place. On the way back the regular circus continued. It really takes more to keep these mouths shut. The travel through the ghats was scenic and comforting.

Journey back

Long way to go

Still going

Nearly there

We are all back. All were rocking and rolling like Elvis Presley for more than a week and these memories will never fade.

Is It a Turning Point

2005-07-08T09:16:00.000-07:00

I joined a company on 1st july. A very good company based on great values and ethics. Life so far has been good. The accomodtion excellent and food.....life supporting. But the question always comes in my mind am I prepared for this? Is this what I want? Initially I thought it's the human need for more riches. No this is not it. Most of my friends say "I need those collage days back". There has been lots of time when I felt the same way too. May be the reasons are entirely different. Is it that I am a lazy bum? It's been 10 days since I am in Pune and you want belive this "I am still on roaming". You are damn lazy man. You are finding reasons to hide. No it is not the truth. There is always the feeling to leave life and go far away from this "Manhattan" crowd. Then the bonds of family, friends, desire, women are all hard to break. Lets face this........ No its the critical turning point and every decision is important. I am churning my thoughts now lets see how good is the butter.

Tired

2005-06-11T15:15:00.000-07:00

It's been long since a post. Nothing; don't feel like doing so. Found wikipedia as a very interising site the links and articles are very helpful.

Life in NITC

2005-04-07T01:40:00.000-07:00

It's been 4 years of change and only change. Life has changed. I made lots of friends and living was a delight. Learned lots of new things (everything except how to be a mechanical engg.). Life had its ups and downs(whatever you may call).

Everybody I talked agrees that they are not what they were 4 years before. I dont think anyone can forget this campus. Its memorable for everyone one way or other. I wanted to write the 4 years in short. No its too big and I am not in a mood (got to play games).

Exams Are On

2005-04-07T01:29:00.000-07:00

Its exam time in NITC the last exams of the last semester people are busy trying to reap marks. Trying hard to attain benchmarks of aggregate mark. For some it is 70 for other 75,65 and so on. Some are too fed up with studies and some as always "want to study but can't" with this the curtain falls, a 4 year long real life drama comes to an end. The final final exam,ha ha haaaaaaaaaa I will be an engineer soon (ha not very funny).

The exams are on and today I had to write an exam with a arm that was in great pain and with a mind which was unwilling to study. It turned out bad as expected (As you sow so you reap. With three exams more to go a feeling of end emerges. Life seems hollow the heart heavy, leave this campus; man I loved it very much. Its a tough thing to part.

It was always with me all through the days when I used to walk alone during midnights, always. It comforted me with cool breeze flowing over my face. Man those days were good (I don't say excellent because I walk when I am sad)

Make Every Day The Same

2005-03-28T01:06:00.000-08:00

It reminds me of the great poet Kabir Das "Kasturi kundal base Mrig goode banvaye" We go after things that are not with us those which are hard to attain but never think of those with us. The key to an happy life is true understanding of our armory. Rather than going after external things if we concentrate in what we have within us we will be more fruitful in life.

Continuing on our "Blogtrip"(its season of ----trip movies now) my collage is a collection of great individuals. They are all great in their own ways and with greatness comes a feeling of pride and with appreciation grows our ego. Then gentlemen(I am not so familiar with the ladies) here live in his own world and most find it difficult to appreciate one outside their group(I am also an gentleman, you know what I mean). Solitude is one symptom I found in many faces however charming he may appear outside. But life is like that you got to keep living with these. Tell you all NITC is a wonderful place to live in with all those wonderful people around you.

My First Blog

2005-03-18T06:33:00.000-08:00

Life is not the saame always and when you are in search of things and sounds that happen with in you you are in certain other plane. you are called a psyco. but i feel only psycos undderstand what they deeply think about. Religion and philosophy are not talks of entertainment or are not subjects to show to the world how great you are.